French jokes and puns - blagues en français 7 (with audio)

01 Jul 2012
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French jokes and puns - blagues en français 7 (with audio)

"Monsieur et Madame" jokes constitute a very famous category in French jokelore. While bearing similarities to "Knock knock" jokes in their use of puns as the basic feature, "Monsieur et Madame" jokes have their specific format: they all start with a question about what an imaginary couple might call their child(ren), based on their last name: "Monsieur et Madame X ont un fils/une fille, comment s'appelle-t-il/elle?"  (Mr. and Mrs. X have a son/daughter, what's his/her name?). What is supposed to cause laughter here is the combination of the given answer, i.e. the child's first name, with the last name already mentioned in the question.

 

 

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1. Monsieur et madame Forme ont trois fils, comment s'appellent-ils?
-Jésus, Hans, Hubert.
(Jésus Hans Hubert Forme: "Je suis en super forme" (I'm full of energy) - you have to play a bit with the pronunciation here!)

2. Monsieur et madame Nastik ont un fils, comment s'appelle-t-il?
- Jim.
(Jim Nastik: gymnastique)

3. Monsieur et Madame Ouzi ont un fils, comment s'appelle-t-il?
– Jacques.
(Jacques Ouzi: "Jacuzzi")

4. Monsieur et Madame Bricot ont un fils, comment s'appelle-t-il?
-Judas.
(Judas Bricot: jus d'abricot - apricot juice)

5. Monsieur et Madame Toilettes ont un fils...
– Alonzo.
(Alonzo Toilettes : allons aux toilettes - let's go to the bathroom)

6. Monsieur et Madame Toilette ont une fille, comment s'apelle-t-elle?
–Aude.
(Eau de toilette)

7. Monsieur et Madame Tommy ont une fille, comment s'apelle-t-elle?
- Anna.
(Anna Tommy - anatomie)

8. Monsieur et Madame Diote ont une fille, comment l'appellent-ils?
– Kelly.
(Kelly Diote - Quelle idiote! Such a dummy!)

9. Monsieur et Madame Bonbeur ont un fils, comment l'appellent-il?
–Jean.
(Jean Bonbeur; jambon beurre - the nickname for a baguette sandwich with butter and ham)

10. Monsieur et Madame Vrogne ont une fille, comment s'appelle-t-elle?
- Kelly.
(Kelly Vrogne : Quelle ivrogne ! what a drunk!)

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Mostafa Abedinifard

I am doing my PhD in Comparative Literature at the University of Alberta. In my research I use three languages: Farsi, English, and French. The first is my mother tongue, and the second has been the language of instruction in my studies during the past decade. As for French, I dare to say that my familiarity with Camille’s great products has been a turning point in my relationship with this language. Thanks Camille!

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